Trust no man; Fear no B!&@%*$

This has got to be the most idiotic car sign I have ever seen! If you are a self-righteous, male-bashing, man-hater..you should stop reading now because you won't appreciate this blog. Let me continue.

“The key is to get to know people and trust them to be who they are. Instead, we trust people to be who we want them to be- and when they're not, we cry.” Unknown

Disappointment and Distrust are sisters. You rarely will see one without the other. Holding onto each other for dear life as if the mere thought of separating is a fate worse than death. Disappointment came first. She was an unplanned pregnancy. I mean her parents honestly had no idea Disappointment was coming. Imagine their surprise when they found out Distrust was not too far behind. Those girls were a handful to raise. Disappointment always seemed to have this way of creeping up when no one was expecting her. Well, let me clarify. The first several times she could sneak up undetected but then strange as it seems, people kind of began to expect her. Guess they got used to her ruining their plans, their hopes, their fun. People grew quite weary of her shenanigans even though they knew she would be coming around just to make their lives miserable.

Disappointment started bringing Distrust around..and well..this just wreaked havoc on people. Now they were kind of used to Disappointment but Distrust, she was really somethin' else. Disappointment tried to tell Distrust to watch who she keeps company with because you see these sisters already had a bad rep. Disappointment knew that even though she wasn't really liked, she was accepted. But, Distrust always gave people a bad feeling. Kind of like the feeling you get when all the hairs on the back of your neck stand straight up. To make matters worse, Distrust started hanging around Fear...now those two girls together did more destruction than Hurricane Katrina!

Once upon a time, I hung out with Distrust and Fear. They seemed so cool at the beginning. All my girlfriends would rally around them. And I can admit I was drawn by their charisma. They were some fiercely independent chicks who seemed to have an answer before the question was even formulated. Distrust said that Fear told her that she must always maintain control. She must always go for hers first. She is to rely on no one. Fear hated men because they were stupid little boys who only had one mission...to make the lives of women miserable. Now of course she didn't really know why she thought this, other than she once heard Disappointment say some guy hurt her. Anyway, I bought into all the propaganda. I had some similar experiences as Disappointment so there must be some truth to all of this. Plus how could millions of women be wrong???!

Today, something bizarre and unexpected happened. Before I get to that, let me tell you that on a first date several months back, I actually said "I just want you to know that I don't trust men". According to my date, I said it four times through out the course of our dinner. Yeah wow...so much for being cool, calm and collected. I'll take Issues for $300 Alex! I digress. Let's go back to today! I was chatting with a very good friend of mine about...men of course. And then I sent this in a text..."It's weird cuz for some strange reason, I can trust him". Not until I was driving home did it hit me. This is GINORMOUS..I mean HUGE! It's not about the who (I know I always say this). It's about my growth. Just read my beginning blogs!

So, all the way home I am logically trying to figure out how or why I could trust this person. It just does not make sense. I remembered my friend telling me at the end of our convo to "Go with the Flow". As I am tossing these things around in my brain, I log onto Facebook. Two things happened tonight. First, I click on my Message From God Application and it says...

... that there is no need to obsess over a decision. God has more in store for us then we can ever predict, and what we fear are bad choices frequently turn out for the best, because our hidden aspirations know better where we are going than our rational minds.

My message was right on time. Secondly, I started writing this blog and decided to add a quote on Trust. I came across the one at the top of the page. As I read. it was as if a light switched on. I trust this friend because I do not box him with my expectations of what he should be. I think he is cool as he is. I have reclaimed the power from Disappointment, Distrust and Fear....this is the beginning of learning to love wholly, purely and unconditionally. And this road is not for the faint of heart for it will be replete with visits from Disappointment, Distrust and Fear. It is my choice to reclaim my power.

During this past Sunday's sermon my Pastor Daddy quoted the following scripture:


Owe no one anything except to love one another, for he who loves another has fulfilled the law. Romans 13:8

Blessed Be,

Jodi

Chemistry....

I decided to make cookies as a surprise for my mom's birthday. Normally, I start by taking two sticks of butter out of the fridge. To all of my Betty's or Martha's out there, you would instantly know that's the start to the Toll House Chocolate Chip Cookie recipe (there will be a quiz at the end). Wanting to break free from the humdrum, I decided to be lazily adventurous. My friend (who shall remain nameless) shared a cake cookie with me recently that was surprisingly delicious. Eager to please, I bought a box of Funfetti Cake Mix...you know, the one with the little multi-colored sprinkles? How perfect and well, fun!

I call her up and say "Hey (friend who shall remain nameless), what is the recipe for the cake cookies?". Friend Doe then replies " Oh girl, it's soooo easy. 1 box of cake mix any flavor and 1 stick of melted butter. Mix. Form into little balls. Bake." Do you need eggs I say to friend who shall remain nameless. "OH NO GIRL, YOU HAVE EVERYTHING YOU NEED WITH THOSE TWO INGREDIENTS"! Voila, cake cookies....UM NO...more like cookie rocks. I call her frantically trying to figure out why my cookies didn't taste like her cookies. What don't I have that she has? What am I missing? If I follow a recipe correctly, shouldn't my results be guaranteed? Friend who shall remain nameless was adamant that all I need is 1 just 1 stick of melted butter and 1 cake mix any flavor. I did see a recipe on the box for cake cookies but, why follow that when my friend's cookies were delicious? Written instructions ignored. No cake cookies...something is just not right.

24 hours a later, friend who shall remain nameless called another friend, who happily informed her that the recipe does in fact call for 1 cake mix, 1 stick of melted butter and uh yeah..two eggs!

Chemistry, it's really rather simple..without the presence of the eggs, the formula just won't work.

This made me think about the composition of ingredients in my relationships. He may have the right job, take me on the right dates, be the right age, say all of the right things yet something is missing. I know I know. Some of you are concerned that I am too picky. Standards too high. But, I don't think so. I am missing huevos!

Last week, I watched Serendipity for like the millionth time. I love that word-Serendipity. It sounds distinguished and intelligent, yet ends with a dipity and that's the fun. It means an aptitude for making desirable discoveries by accident. And isn't that fun..desirable discoveries by accident?

One day, I will exclaim that during all my waiting, searching, traveling, meeting people, organizing events, reconnecting with friends, I met someone. Not just any someone....

 I learned a lot from my experience with that terrible batch of cookies. 1.) Celebrate life and show your appreciation. 2.)You'll get by with a little help from your friends. 3.) When listening to your friends' advice pay attention to the written instructions(bible) and your gut instinct. 4.) Follow them with a strong conviction. 5.) When you make a bad batch, don't be afraid to start all over.

The chemistry, the recipe, the combination just has to be right.....