Welcoming the New Year

My first post of the year! It took me 26 days to sit down at the computer and transform my thoughts into words.

I have always been very hard on myself. I practice self-criticism. I'm so comfortable in it just like an old sweater. Even when I may want to put on something new I tend to resort to the familiar. I find myself pairing self-criticism with worry. They compliment one another pretty well. And because they have accompanied me for so long, I stopped noticing them. And that's when I realized I was in deep trouble.

By the way, may I remind you that I named myself jodisjoy on several social media sites. Yes, I ramble off feel good quotes and positive words all day even, while wearing my old sweater of "not enough". It's much easier to encourage others.

The day I Googled Chronic Fatigue Syndrome proved to be a sign that change is necessary. Simply, purely, completely and utterly exhausted, I knew I was done! Initially this too worried me. Who has time for exhaustion? I need to get more done at work, take on extra duties, ensure my son graduates on time, pay all of the bills, grow spiritually, create meaningful relationships, stay positive, cook dinner, enjoy life, inspire others, counsel my friends, accept invitations to 1,001 events, read self-help books, lose weight, save money, make it to dance class, develop my blog, build a name on Twitter, take more photos for Instagram, learn to use Facebook for marketing. No wonder I feel this way.

I think "just relax and do nothing" and swiftly follow that with "ain't nobody got time for that"!








This morning as I sat on my couch half watching TV and half staring into a space of nothing, I felt panic try to overtake me. "You should be mopping your floors. You've been home all weekend and you've gotten nothing done". I said a little prayer and immediately the still small voice within reminded me "It's your time to rest. You are exactly where you are supposed to be, doing exactly what you are supposed to do. All is well"! A sweet peace and a beautiful comfort came over me. To celebrate, I took a nap.

"The Lord gives strength to his people; the Lord blesses his people with peace."
~Psalms 29:11

P.S. Other than one trip to the grocery store, I have been in my house since Thursday night with my phone on silent. Bliss!

Jodi